Oh Noes!!

Alright. So I missed yesterday's blog. Sue me. I will get better at this keeping a schedule thing as time goes on.

In the meantime, I will at least make sure I get my three blogs a week up so I am posting this one as a sort of make-up exam.

Let me tell you a thing about Austin...

Austin is a great place to live most of the time. It's 65 degrees outside right now as opposed to the negative 10 I used to have to put up with at this time of year. I just came inside from sitting on my front porch enjoying the lovely, misty weather and, I have to say, I am rather pleased about that.

The trouble with Austin, however, is the trade off.

I don't have to deal with winter but I do have to deal with Cedar.

Cedar sucks my friends.

This is a Cedar tree. If you see one, I strongly encourage you to burn it to the ground and salt the earth! You can do a little ritual dance on the spot for years to come and, hey, who doesn't enjoy a good bonfire?

I am an asthmatic smoker (read: fucking moron) and my allergies, without fail, go straight to affecting my breathing.

Holy shit, do I miss oxygen sometimes.

The other night I woke up having an asthma attack so bad that I was panicking about how in the nine hells I was going to make it clear to my lovely and wonderful roommate that I needed her to get up and take me to the hospital.

Seriously!

I was trying to work out, through my sleep addled, panic induced fog of a brain, how to get my point across to her when I couldn't draw enough air to form words!

Don't worry. I got my shit under control before dying and all that. But you bet your ass that I explained to her that me standing over her in bed pounding my chest translates to "Woman! Get some clothes on your ass and drive me to an emergency room!"

No way in hell that I am going to risk not being able to get that point across to her in the future!

Anyway! I suppose that what I am saying here is that, while I am slightly apologetic for deviating from my schedule, I will get there in time. It will get easier once nature stops trying to murder me in my sleep.

In the meantime, sweet readers, I bid you ado. I will talk at you all again soon and in the meantime I leave you with these words...

Foible.

Shindig.

Gabardine.

Hullabaloo!

Enjoy them and try to find a way to work them into conversation over the next couple days. It could be fun for all of us!

I used to wake up at 4am and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness.
-James Thurber-