When I am Old...

This is a video I was aware of long ago and an old friend of mine just reminded me of it's existence. It is fairly short so I invite you to take a quick look now, before reading on.



Gods, how I love that reality. It serves me as a reminder of just how much I am looking forward to living my life as an old man.

It also works wonders, I think, in reminding us all to have some bloody fun in our every day lives. Now, I am not telling you to go out and get a spare steering wheel or anything... But if you happen to have one laying around somewhere, could I maybe borrow it?

Seriously though folks... There isn't a whole lot of point to living our day to day lives if we don't have any joy in them. Go out and find some and remind yourself to enjoy living!

Shared joy is a double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow.
Shared pain is lessened; shared joy is increased.
-Swedish Proverb and it's transition to the motto of Callahan's Place from the mind of Spider Robinson-

New Year, New Plan...

And I was doing so well for a while there...

Last year I worked my ass off to make a lot of positive changes in my life. A number of them even grew into something wonderful before I allowed the stress of work and the holidays to drag me back down into the pits I used to live in.

But no more!

I am back to blogging and I will be doing my best to make this a regular thing again. I am going to do some book reviews for my literary minded readers. (Although, I should warn you, I don't promise to make it about new releases. I expect I will mostly tell you about the books I know and love in an effort to bring some great stories an writers into your lives.) And, as always, I will share my thoughts about whatever else comes to mind.

For the here and now, I just wanted to let you all know I am back to it so you should watch for updates from me again. I am giving myself the goal of posting three times a week from here on out. I am unwilling to go so far as to tell you what days of the week but I will do everything in my power to at least get three posts up between Monday and Sunday.

To that end... If anyone has a topic or thought they would like me to spew forth about, please share them with me! I think it would be fun to try to incorporate some reader feedback as well so, for the love of everything good, please give me some! My comment sections should be for discussion between all of us so don't be afraid to use it!

I guess what I mean is that the new plan is the same as the old plan. Move forward, build momentum, change the world. Even if it is only my little corner of things, I expect the change will be great!

All that being said, I am going to move on for now. I look forward to chatting with you all soon!.

-Me-

P.S. For those whose blogs I follow, I will be catching up and commenting again soon. I have missed you all as much as I hope you have missed me.

A blog is what all websites want to be; updated on a regular basis, contains content that is of interest to a select or target audience, and is easy to update or change.
-Unknown-

Stone soup...

Everybody, I hope, has heard the story of stone soup.

You remember...

The story is the one in which everybody in the village or wherever is getting pretty hungry because no one's crops did very well that year. One day, random-lady-A starts telling everyone how she is going to make an old family recipe called stone soup. Stone soup is this wonderful concoction her great-great-great grandmother created. It never comes out quite the same way twice because you just throw in a little of whatever you happen to have on hand but it invariably comes out as a wonderfully flavorful dish that everyone enjoys.

Well, as the story goes on, all these neighbors she has been talking to start salivating and, soon enough, everyone around has a hankerin' to try this stone soup stuff. One by one the neighbors start to surreptitiously show up at the house as she cooks. Each of them, as they arrive, just happens to have something with them to add to the soup. One person has carrots, another some broccoli. Hank, from down the way, brought a rabbit that he had caught earlier that day. I like to think that the chef of our story breathed out a heavy sigh of relief when, finally, Delores comes in with a couple heads of garlic...

Obviously, as each person comes in the house, another ingredient is added to the pot. Everyone is being social and the excitement over the soup continues to grow. In time, this glorious soup takes a shape spiced by friendship and flavored with love. Everyone gets to have some and, more importantly, everybody leaves full and more than satisfied. Hank even gets to take some home for his dog.

The moral of the story as I understand it is not, as some of you may think, that a woman with a rock and a well gets to eat for free. Rather, it comes down, basically, to the fact that there is wealth to be found in friendship and that love and camaraderie is enough to sustain us.

I don't know exactly how I feel about all that but I was afforded the opportunity earlier today to create and serve a communal meal.

It was pretty neat to get to take ingredients from different households and combine them to make a meal to share amongst a group. Each of us added something to the concoction and, when everything was said and done, all of us got to share a delicious meal with friends where everyone was able to contribute.

It was fun.

I look forward to doing communal meals again in the future and I will let y'all know how it comes together.

Cooking is like making love, you do it well, or you do not do it as all.
-Harriet van Horne-

Note to readers... I am aware of the fact that there are dozens of versions of the story of stone soup. I have read some involving a soldier or even a small group of soldiers. I even remember one from when I was a kid where the chef in the story was a hen. In my world, it was the same Little Led Hen who baked bread all by her self in an effort to teach the other farm animals not to be lazy bastards.

Truth...

I have nothing much to say this time around. I really think it would do each and every one of us good to read/hear/watch this at least once if not every day.

Please. Please pay attention and actually take this in. Please think about it honestly and deeply. Please show it to your friends and ask them to really consider it as well.

Watch this all the way through. Really. It is important.

The world we live in today is scary. We need to change something to save us from ourselves. Maybe, with this, we can start with ourselves and the change can flow outward.

Without further ado, Lost Generation by Jonathan Reed.



I am not going to to end with a quote this time. I am going to beg you, one more time, to share this.

Thank you.

Friends...

Friend...

The American Heritage Dictionary (via Wordnik) defines the word friend as follows.

1. noun A person whom one knows, likes, and trusts.

It goes on from there to define the word at various other levels but I think I am going to stick with the original for what I want to talk about. I do think it worth mentioning one other entry from the good old AHD which is as follows...

7. Word History: A friend is a lover, literally. The relationship between Latin amīcus "friend” and amō "I love” is clear, as is the relationship between Greek philos "friend” and phileō "I love.” In English, though, we have to go back a millennium before we see the verb related to friend. At that time, frēond, the Old English word for "friend,” was simply the present participle of the verb frēon, "to love.” The Germanic root behind this verb is *frī-, which meant "to like, love, be friendly to.” Closely linked to these concepts is that of "peace,” and in fact Germanic made a noun from this root, *frithu-, meaning exactly that. Ultimately descended from this noun are the personal names Frederick, "peaceful ruler,” and Siegfried, ”victory peace.” The root also shows up in the name of the Germanic deity Frigg, the goddess of love, who lives on today in the word Friday, "day of Frigg,” from an ancient translation of Latin Veneris diēs, "day of Venus.”

Damn! That is some interesting stuff! I am, by no means, a lexicographer. (I learned that word from Erin McKean. If you don't know who this wonderful woman is, I recommend meeting her here. She is also the entrepreneur behind Wordnik, a website dedicated to reshaping the dictionary to better fit in the current age. I encourage you all to check it out and offer your support!) But come on! The history and roots of our language are amazing!

Anyway... I guess that, in an effort to break all of that down to basics, friends are people you love.

Alright, I can get on board with that. Let me take a look at how that definition fits into my life.

I have tons of friends! Holy shit! Who knew!??

Seriously though... I have friends from every place I have lived over the years. I am going to set aside the trust thing for now (I have issues, alright?) and just focus on the people I love.

Family? Check! I may not be as close to them as many people are to their families but, whether from years of shared experiences or due to genuine connections I have formed with them throughout my life, I do indeed love most of my family. By the definition we are working with, my family members are my friends.

People I knew growing up? Check again! I will be honest here and say right off the bat that I don't really talk to many people from my childhood. (For the sake of this definition we will call my childhood anything that took place before I turned... Oh... Let's say around 13 or so.) When I really stop to think about it though, yes. Yes, there are still people from my childhood whom I love. Kieth, Jason, Duff... I may not be involved in, or even aware of their lives anymore, but I do still feel love for them. At least enough so that, if I found out they were in town, I would veritably jump at the chance to sit down and visit with them over coffee. Maybe even enough that, given the opportunity, I would happily reaffirm and revisit our friendship in the context of our lives.

So, from what I can tell I have about a hundred friends so far and I am just getting into my teens. Lets take a look at the next phase of my life.

Adolescence? Absolutely. There are a few people from this period of my life whose lives have become so inter-meshed with mine over the years that I dont think I will ever be rid of them! In particular Paul, Bob and Janelle. I see them far too infrequently and talk to them only a little more but I can say without a shadow of a doubt that these people are my friends. There are of course others, but these are the people who, if I ever needed a shoulder to cry on, they would not flinch from me in the least. More importantly, they know that should the need ever arise, I would do the same for them.

Moving right along... Eventually I moved out of high school and into college. I have to admit, I didn't do too well at living this phase of my life and, in retrospect, I can't say that I genuinely formed any bonds there. That isn't to say that the people there weren't worth bonding with. To the contrary, I do actually harbor some sadness that I am unable to name any of the people I knew then as friends. Maybe, (Hopefully?) some of them do consider me a friend and one day I will be able to return that bond when chance and circumstance permit.

::sniffle:: Alright, better get over it and move forward.

I can't think of an effective way to break down the years since school ended so it looks like the remainder of my life gets to get all thrown together.

Adulthood? Ohhh yeah. I have had any number of jobs over the years and at each and every one of them I have formed some kind of lasting love for someone. Some of those friends are people I am still sporadically in touch with. Others I haven't heard from in years but the list in my head of the people I have loved, and continue to love, in my adulthood are too numerous and too varied to even begin to list off. Suffice it to say that if any one of them ever needed my help with something and I were in a position to give them the help they needed, I would do so without batting an eye.

Scarily enough, I still have a couple of life periods (as I reckon these things) to touch on. Don't worry, I will do my best to be brief. (Insert rather long winded aside here. :p)

Tennessee? Oh hell yes. I only lived in Tennessee for about a year (this time around) but I do believe I made some lasting friendships there. I will admit readily that I am not the best at keeping in touch with any of them but I do genuinely try. More importantly, they know that and make an effort to remain in touch with me as well. I have to say in all honesty that, when I was with my friends in Tennessee was the time when I felt closest to a group of people. That group doesn't exist anymore and I still love each and every individual I had there. But when I look back with wonder and nostalgia in my eye, it is most often the group that I miss most.

Which brings us, finally, to the present. The present in this instance consists of the last two and a half years or so. To be more specific, the time I have lived here, in Austin. It has taken me a good deal of time to start developing friends here due mainly to my lack of social ambition. I am consciously working on that these days and, upon examination, I seem to be doing better than I had thought. I have several people with whom I am able to sit and converse on a variety of levels and topics and, as time goes on, some of them do seem to be turning into genuine friends and people I love. Each of them I think (and hope) knows who they are and, I hope, feels the same way toward me.

There is one person, however, from this most recent stage of my life, who deserves special mention. I have found through this time the one person I have been closest to. My roommate Manda and I have been living together since my arrival here and it has been wonderful. For the first time in my life, I have a person who I can genuinely connect with regularly and who I trust to be there as my support and sounding stone whether I need her to be or not. Even more amazingly, she has grown into someone who, even when I want to kill her for it, will tell me the honest and unadulterated truth. Someone for whom I can express both respect and love.

That isn't to say there aren't times when we drive one another insane or to the brink of homicide. The important thing is that we have both grown into our selves in such a way as to be able to accept the idiosyncrasies of one another. We have created a home together hinging on mutual respect and support and we are continuing to grow together now and for the foreseeable future.

If you find yourself without a person like this in your life, I truly hope you are able to meet one someday. Whether they be a friend, lover, sibling, spouse, parent or child, this truest of friends is someone to cherish so be sure that you do so. If you don't cherish them as they so richly deserve, I will find you. I mean it. And you really really don't want me to do that.

And so, in closing, I have friends. I am betting that you do too. I recommend that you take a moment now and then to take stock of that fact and relish it wholeheartedly.

A friend may well be the masterpiece of Nature.

A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud.

The only reward of virtue is virtue; the only way to have a friend is to be one.

It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson- four separate quotes from one amazing mind

The World Has Issues... Episode 2

There is a thing that has been brought up a time or two from various directions and today it struck me in a way that is reverberating around the inside of my skull, clamoring to be shared.

I think it is (mostly) self-evident when looking at the world surrounding me that, somewhere along the way, things took a turn. In particular, I am referring to the fact that happiness is thriving as a counter-culture to the one that most of us are living in.

It pains me that I have to stop and think to realize that, when I gaze around myself at the people inhabiting my world, most of those closest to me are struggling to keep depression and abject misery at bay. In fact, this truth has become so commonplace that it is just accepted as the way things are! I know almost no one who spends their time helping others actually achieve moments of happiness and joy. It seems that, as a rule, we are just too busy trying to keep each other from plummeting into the pits of despair.

Off the top of my head I can give you almost a hundred simple, daily illustrations of this truth but, frankly, I think it is so utterly appalling that I need to come at it all from a different angle.

Hence the illustration I am going to attempt to give as to how happiness has become a sub-culture that is thriving as it strives to run parallel to, and occasionally intersect with, the culture that most of us struggle through our day to day lives living in. (Yes, I know that two things cannot be parallel and yet intercept... We are using words here, not math. Alright?!)

Allow me to begin by sharing a video I was introduced to quite some time ago. It is a video documentary of something that should never have been extraordinary. Yet, because of the way we live our lives, it was not only extraordinary but also tragic, triumphant and, more than a little bit hopeful.



See what I mean? It is horrifying that we live in a world where this was so shocking as to necessitate being banned. Even more terrifying, however, is the fact that... in this day and age, so very very many people can be touched in so profound a way just by the simple act of sharing a hug with a stranger.

Another worrisome and bothersome truth is the simple fact that I find myself envious of those who seem to be in a place that they enjoy. (I know for a fact that I am not alone in this but it is up to everyone else as to whether they care to own up to that truth.) I am not saying that I am unhappy where I am.... Just... Well... You will see what I mean.


I will share two videos to show what I mean by this and then I am going to go find a way to have some fun for myself for just a few minutes. See you after the videos!





Alright, I'm back. Now where the hell are my people and why are we not having that kind of fun together just for the sake of doing so!??!

Why should it be the case that others get to have so much fun when the world doesn't see fit to furnish me with the time or opportunity to have as much fun myself. By no means do I think that those who are enjoying life should stop. To the contrary, I rather think that perhaps the rest of us should take a long hard look at what we are doing and find a way to incorporate more joy and wonder in our own lives.

It occurs to me rather belatedly that many people who know me in the world I currently inhabit are going to find all of this rather hard to accept as having come from my mind. On first impression I, apparently, come off as a dour, mean and miserable person. To those who believe that to be true, I can only say that I am sorry that you do not know who and what I really am. Everything that has been included here are sentiments that I feel from the very bottom of my heart and, more importantly, are truths that I believe in to the very core of my being.

Orson Welles, a tremendous (and sadly deceased) author gave his final interview only a couple hours before his death. At its core, this interview sums up beautifully what I have been trying to explain to everyone for years. Please, watch this last video and pay close attention to, not only the words this wonderful man says, but also to the true feeling and truth behind them.



*Merv: Are certain parts of your life really joyous?
*Orson: Oh yes! There are certain parts of almost every day that are joyous. I am not essentially a happy person but I have all kinds of joy. And there's a difference you know. Because joy is a great big, electrical experience. Just happiness is what a... oh I don't know, a warthog could be happy...
-Orson Welles on the Merv Griffin Show only hours before his death-